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The Transformers You Don’t Hear About

by Andrew Tavin | Jul 18, 2016 | Satire | 0 comments

The Transformers You Don’t Hear About

With the five hundredth or so Transformers movie on the way, it’s time to look at some of the least popular transformers who haven’t gotten a chance in the spotlight:

Boximus Maximus  (transforms into a Nissan Cube)

Boximus has giant glasses. Like the biggest glasses you’ve ever seen. You’re probably thinking they’re only big because he’s a giant robot, but these glasses are large even by robot standards and they fall off as soon as he starts fighting. Whenever Boximus goes out to eat with the other Autobots, he always orders the cheapest possible thing on the menu but asks to try some of everyone’s food. He does make the best peanut butter crackers, but you can just buy those in packs of six, so why bother?

Smartra (transforms into a Smart Car)

Smartra would be a major asset to the team if they weren’t always forgetting about her. Since she’s so small. Honestly she doesn’t mind being left behind since she’s more of a reader than a fighter. Smartra loves sharing Buzzfeed lists about introverts with just the caption “THIS.” All of the transformers are always tripping over her, but at least she gets to feel superior for consuming less gasoline.

Jitters (transforms into a beat up 1967 Chevelle)

Jitters has definitely seen better days. He’s constantly leaking oil and breaks into coughing fits with every other word. He’s always talking about how things have never been the same since the sixties and how the music robot kids listen to these days is just noise. He’s right, but robot music in the sixties was also just noise. Robot’s find noise to be pleasant.

Quickshift (transforms into a stick shift)

Quickshift has the incredible ability to make other transformers more difficult to drive. She keeps offering to help out, so the other bots have to come up with excuses to ditch her. They think she doesn’t realize what they’re doing, but she knows. Every birthday she wishes that she could be something cars actually want inside them, like a cup holder or a tv screen that can keep the kids quiet for thirty minutes while they watch Frozen for the seven hundredth time.

Uneetra (transforms into a unicycle)

Uneetra only eats at restaurants that serve expensive versions of things you could easily make yourself. She lives on a street with eight stores that each specialize in a different kind of yarn. Did you even know there were that many kinds of yarn? Uneetra will tell you all about it if you run into her at a party. She also owns a ukulele but has never gotten around to learning how to play it.

Reginald Q. Twitterbottom III (transforms into a golf cart)

RQT III thinks he’s too good for any of the other transformers. Instead of fighting, he just hangs out with the other rich robots at the country club, deciding which youth centers they’ll purchase and convert into malls. He has the largest collection of monocles in the Western Hemisphere.

Buuurd (transforms into one of those two-wheeled scooter things that everyone calls hoverboards even though they don’t hover)

Always catches on fire by accident. No longer allowed on public buses.

Photo credit: Nissan

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Summary
The Less Popular Transformers: More Than Meets the Eye
Article Name
The Less Popular Transformers: More Than Meets the Eye
Description
These are the less popular Transformers. The Transformers you don't hear about. The Transformers that society has forgotten.
Author
Andrew Tavin
Publisher Name
CarStory
Publisher Logo
CarStory

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