Told your friends you took a South Fork getaway? Uh…that’s not what your Instagram says. If you’re going to lie about the amazing Hamptons hotspots you took in last weekend, just make sure you don’t get snapped driving one of these dead giveaways:
5. A 2009 Honda Accord
Want bang for your buck? Get an Accord. Wanna LOOK like a million bucks? Get anything else!!! While the Honda Accord is the perfect car for the 24-year-old who had his child out of wedlock, it really doesn’t scream “effortless luxury.” It does, however, scream, ”I work for a living.” That’s the worst look you can have in the Hamptons.
4. A 2008 Honda Accord
The 2008 Accord gets fairly decent gas mileage, which is the first sign you’re not hanging out with rich people. Rich people only drive cars that run on crushed chunks of other cars. Unless you have to fill the tank with diamonds and endangered species, it’s not worthy of being seen with in The Hamptons.
3. One of the Cars from Disney’s Cars’ Luigi’s Rollickin’ Roadsters
C’mon, you were clearly in an amusement park, and the amusement parks on the South Fork don’t have the Disney license. There’s no way you were in the Hamptons. Why are you lying about this? What do you even have to gain? We’ll still like you if you didn’t vacation in the Hamptons. We’re worried about you. We love you.
2. A Clown Car With 9 Clowns Out, 12 Left To Go
Holy shit, we’re not even halfway out of clowns in this clown car. What a disaster. The only thing that could be worse would be if this appeared on Faceboo- WUH-OH! Mopsy, I asked you not to selfie with me in the background! That’s it, I’m staying in the tiny car.
1. A Car With A Vanity Plate That Spells “Not In Hamptons”
Stay FAR away from this one, friends!! ‘Nuff said!